living in budapest is not easy. the work i do, the isolation and loneliness i sometimes feel, and the language that i do not understand all makes for some rough days. what keeps me going here, though, is the sense of calling that i feel to be here. i find refuge in the clear sense of purpose that i feel in this place.
i left behind everything that i’ve ever known to come to budapest, hungary in october, following a calling that i had been hearing for years on end. i worried that, upon my arrival, i might realize that i was mistaken about this pull i felt to be serving as a global mission intern with global ministries. as it turned out, however, the longer i’m here the stronger the pull gets — and that’s something that i’m so thankful for.
living in budapest and serving with the reformed church in hungary in all my different roles feels more right than anything i’ve ever done in my life. i have a sense of deep assurance that the work i’m doing here is exactly what i am meant to be doing. it feels like everything that i’ve done in my life before this has all been leading up to and preparing me for this very experience and service.
i can’t even begin to put into words how spectacular it feels to have found something that i am this passionate about and that fulfills me so deeply at such a young age. when i talk about it in person i cry, and the people who are around me get super uncomfortable, but i’m just really passionate about it.
some days i come home from work exhausted and drained, tired and overwhelmed. i miss my family and my friends back home who could relate to me seamlessly and without any kinds of cultural confusion. i crave the comfort foods that i grew up with and a kitchen new enough to actually cook them in. some days i get home from my various jobs and all i want is a hug from my mother, but that’s just not a possibility right now.
my calling to be here isn’t always easy. in fact, some days it’s insanely hard and it challenges me in ways that i never could have anticipated. it’s this challenge though that excites me and reminds me that i’m in the right spot — that i have been called to this very place and time for a reason, and that i am truly meant to be here.
i still don’t know exactly what my vocation is for the long-term, but i’ve definitely found my calling for right now, and i take refuge in that.